Can add one virtue to the Five we have?
"Tis not for mind, but matter, that we read.
Such matter as will help us to acquire Nhe art of foiling sundry little games. My mind, indeed!—seven toilful years have sped Since first I laboured through the ABC; Seven years of labour. What is the result A few vexed questions or disputed points, A few new theories and ways to live, Perchance a little wisdom here and there, Though wrapped in matter foreign to our taste.
What was it Inst? Bunyan or Mrs.
Ward, Marcus Aurelius, Dickens or Macbeth?
I know not: neither, so far, do I know Why I am here, where going or whence come.
A year ago I read the 'Book of Books,' Greatly advised thereto—ah, tis a book Of precious wisdom, and right well it were Did all men live the life therein laid down Yet found I nothing of the hundred sects That come to teach us each a different way Through bigotry to everlasting life. The spirit of that teaching won iny heart, But not the teachers—men intolerant,
Each seeing it obscurely through the Disputing o'r the letter ofthe Word, mist Arising from the bias of his mind. Aye, we would spread this Book throughout Cathay, But not the mummeries of wrangling sts, The pomp and pride and circumstance of sects, But there, enough of books!
Only, good Wu, See that you order swiftly and procure A Beeton's Cookery and Kipling's last. And now, most worthy Chin, I fain would know How go the fortunes of our Privy Purse?
Chin—Not over well, your Majesty: in fact We either must raise money, or retrench.
His Majesty——Retrench, you say?
Expenses have been high Levées entail much lavishness in ress, And three State Balls, unsparing of champagne, Have swallowed up our small economies Therein we had no choice,—a first-rate Power, On Europe's lines, must posture and grimace "But they are done with' fur the pre-
Ay, but that four-in-hand, the new-laid Park, The water-works, electric lights, and launch, The extra.
His Majesty "There! you needn't mind the rest_ For you, good Chancellor, to find the funds Is but the path of duty, evident. What's more, referring to my notebook here, I see it written: "Item, send to Worth For dresses for the Empress and her suite Décolletés and befitting their high rank Item; to pension from th' Imperial schools All teachers of the Anglo-Saxon tongue Hailing from Scotland or America, For they corrupt with barbarous dialects, Chin-—My liege, it shall be done—but how to raise His Mujesty—_ Objections, or the wind John Stuart Mill Has systems for them both which you and I Can work no better than he did him-sell, And yet methinks we are not without ways 'Yo fill our purse forthwith, Wu—I kinder guess. His Majesty—Harvard again Good Wu, I beg of you Draw up that pension edict speedily. 'We want a well of English undefiled,' And not a crop of victims like yourself.
But now to business; ever-thoughtful Chin, Take out your tablets, Sir, and you shall see The Dragon Throne has dabbled in finance.
First, be it noted that, with every mail, Our bulk of correspondence grows apace Bach week at least a hundred worthy souls Ask for the favour of my autograph, To cheer the gloom of Dealek villages And many be that write for postage stamps.
Then searce a day goes by but I receive Letters from missionaries of every sort, Each humbly begging Providence to guide My heart aright (that is, to follow theirs—
As if one heart could go a imundred ways!) And asking me to grant monopoly (For China's good) to their peculiar rand.
All these, good Chin, I think are Heaven-sent, ie.
As ravens to the Prophet were of old. Says not the sage "'The wise may often glean Much profit from necessity of fools?" Therefore Ihave decided to appoint An agency in London, which shall sel My autograph in English and Chinese; Where also we shall do a trade in stamps—New issues to be printed quarterly. And finally, for half a million taels One province may be leased for seven years "Yo any creed or sect's monopoly, With slight reduction on a quantity, And benefit of all the local shrines. Hereby, good Councillors, you may observe We shall be testing systems by their fruits And that which shall produce most honesty, Most gentleness and Christian charity, Shall have another lease—and pny no more, What think ye, worthy Sirs Chin—Great wisdom lies Inevery word, Oh Brother of the Sun! His Maj Well, make me up the usual estimates Before to-night, methinks, it should suffice If not, I notice in the London news Chat pric-a-prac is coming in again here should be possibilities in that, If we increase our stock of palace ware,"
And keep an eye on buyers from the tates.
Chin—_ It shall be done.
His Majesty—And lastly, we must know Which of those syndicates desires the boon Of building us the railway to Canton; Whichever pays the most can have the job.
Chin—Your Majesty shall shortly be supplied With facts and figures...
His Majesty—Good; then get ye gone, For I am weary. Wu, just touch: the bell And bid John Thomas beat me up an With half a glass of port—the usual thing.
Farewell, my trusty Councillors, farewell! [Exeunt ambo, [His Majesty resumes his pipe and takes up Punch]
Well, weli—all this is better than the time " nar When here was strict formality's routine.
We've made a few improvements since the days When first I struggled with c-a-t, cat.
Nobaceo, sanitation and champagne, Sloan streets, good food and comfort table chairs Were all unknown before I learned to read And. they have taught me more of what we lack
Text read from the printed page and cleaned; old type leaves the occasional error.