The Offer of A Lifetime give you my life," said a not unmusical voice.
We glanced up to behold first of all a cerise turban. Below this was a swarthy visage so bewhiskered as to inspire tite conviction that there would be no shortage of vegetables this winter. "Spinach," we breathed thankfully, "is in the market agai fang we resolved to look up the price in the Municipal Gazette.
Below the moon-like hirsute piysiognomy was a neckcloth much the worse for wear. This, in turn, rested upon a shirt tastefully bespattered with beige horseshoes intersected by lurid vermilion stripes, all on a background of mauve. Broad waite braces, supporting the conventional khal trousers resembling a gunny sack, obliterated some of the—cubist picture. Below. this line we could not see as the desk intervened, Were there pink shoes, we wonder ed? Without pink shoes, tae picture! could not possibly be complete. We! pretended to grope for something underneath the desi. There were showed it by Raving Chang on the: the apparition a second time.
Te was a generous offer, and we thanked him. At the same time we explained that we already possessed 2 life for what it was worth, and would be at a loss to know what to do with his in addition. Just what, we asked him, did he taluk might be accomplished by linking our lives? To begin with, he was of the sex, not to mention the fact that we have been married for more than two decades. To these suggestions, Kaleidoscope responded with "I give you my life."
Then swam into our recollection the immortal words; "No. greater love hath a man than this....." But what reason had Kaleidoscope to love oF we him, for that matter? only were fre utter strangers, but he Tooked far from loveable. If, thought Wo, strangers are going to fall in love with us at first sight at our age, had best adopt precautions. In this instance, to be sure, twas but aman, But who could say where the lightning might strike and blast what little reputation we still pos sess? These reflexions were interrupted by Kaleidoscope, wee give you my lie" ko reiterated, this time with marked emphasis "And what are we to give you in exchange?" we politely inquired, We took it for granted that his proffer was based upon strict Spanish hospitality, wherein the host's house immediately becomes the neat's (with a string tied to it).
"Iam so watcher," Kaleidoscope vouchsafed.
"Watehergivinus?" we countered, deeming it part of the strange ritual, "Pifteeen dollars one month," he! volunteered.
"My, we are getting on, aren't we our encouraging rejoinder.
cannot live on it," said Kaleidoscope sadly.
"We have not asked you to," we reminded him.
"'E give you my life, very] solemnly, and for the fifth time.
We took pity on his ignorance, Did he think that an embryo editor was much better off, oF that the additional $15 to be reaped monthly by combining our lives would eon-wince Shanghai that two can live as cheaply as one? Just what did he want?
"You are a great Master," he in formed us.
Thank heaven he did not say, "You! or "You are not a mother: you my feelings." growing tense enough without that, "You are a great master," Kaleidostope repeated.
We fingered our last ten-cent piece reluctantly. He appeared to have cai ritd it But before we could proffer it to him, he betrayed a "you-may-
"You have friends who are also great masters," he went on to say.
We acknowledged that this was the ease, "They will need a watcher," he suggested.
Some of them, we admit, could do with a bit of watching, especially at night, but we did not tell Kaleidocape thi "'T have no place to sleep," he then informed us.
The light dawned. He had no place to sleep, so quite logically was applying for a berth og night-watchman. We could not but admire his frankness. Truth—at least Shanghai—need not always be sought fat ghe bottom of a well. Indeed, did she lodge there, she might be infected by the water, or suffer from a chlorinated ear. No. Here was proof tinat she might lurk beneath a cerise turban surmounting a crop of vege! ables supported by a eeckeloth that rested on a cubist shirt. We beamed comprehension upon him.
You wish us to recommend you as a night-watchman?" smile revealed a set, of the Malco's best ready-made teeth. give you my life" he exclaimed, fervently.
"Give us not your life, O Brother, we declaimed with great histrionic effect. "Give us rather your name and address, together with some assurance that you are not billed to apear before the British Magistrate give gol my life," was his grateful assurance, a8! he took his leave.
We contemplated a Hood decid. We
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