Oty Jones looked cautiously round the door—and saw a burglar trying open the safe in the corner.
"Just wait here a minute will you? asked Jones politely.
and ave you phone the per-retorted the burglar sarcastic-replied Jones, "I won't just want to cal my wile She'll be glad to meet you. Shv's heard "you every night for the Vast 20 years."
Pretty Bad A cen ram popular footballer hat all players daman off day, when he could do nothing tight, The crowd demonstrated its dis: pleasure, und his fellow pilyers looked at him askance, but bore 'The final blow fell, however, when he left the ground at the end' of the game. A grubby urchin, who had been hanging round the players' entrance, sidled up to him' and thrust piece of paper, into his hand, "'Exe, mister," he said. sadly, th yore blinking' autograft Blotto A ama who had been celebrating with his friends a recent happy event fu his family continued onto. the Registrar's office, where he stood £01 8 moment collecting "his. thoughts. Then he said to the Registrar:
"Gentlemen, Te come {0 rexistor "Why do you address mo as gentlomen'?" I'm" alone here," said" the Registrar.
"Is that so?" said the newly-made father, rubbing his eyes. "Then reckon I'd better go home and have another look at that "cradle"
Cleric Holds Baby Tue local vicar, besides being a very strong temperance advocate, Was a very kindly man.
One morning, when on his round of the parish, he saw an old lady pushing a pram up a very steep hill. Immediately he offered to help her.
clergyman pulling and panting from At the top of the, hill, with, the the heat and the exertion, the old lady was profuse in her thanks, The vicar would have none of. it.
"No, no," he said. "There's nothing [to thank me for, But perhaps, as 3 Ute reward, you will let_me have 8 Took at the baby.
"Baby!" exclaimed the woman. "Bless "your heart, sir, there's no baby. It's two dozen of stout
Text read from the printed page and cleaned; old type leaves the occasional error.