Tur argument in the railway carriage was waxing fast and furious, The train was on its way to Scarborough, and the passengers were in happy mood so that the argument never became really serious, One of the chief speakers, however, noticing a meek little man in the corner who had not, so far, said anything, clapped him on the shoulder and asked:
"Well old man, do you believe in the survival of the fittest?"
"Certainly not," said the little man, without a smile, "I don't believe in the survival of anybody. I'm an undertaker."
One Man Show Tue Territorials were engaged upon their annual camp at the seaside, and one of the Tawest recruits had been told off as batman to the O.C.
The first morning the recruit went to receive his orders, "Ab, my man," said the colonel, looking him Over, "your work will be to clean my boots, polish my buttons, shine my belt, shave me; then see to my horse, groom it, clean the bridle and saddle. After that you cook and serve my breakfast, and clean up everything in the tent. Then on to the parade ground, where you'll drill for two hours. Now, is all clear?"
The recruit scratched his head.
"That's quite clear, sir," he replied. "But, tell me—is there anyone else in the Army?"
Text read from the printed page and cleaned; old type leaves the occasional error.