My friend's brand new barometer Stayed stuck at hurricane, He wrote a letter to the shop, And hotly did complain, When he came back from posting it, He sought his house in vain, For where it used to be, he found Nothing but wind and rain.
Cause for Alarm "WELL," said the boss, who was a little cross that morning, "I'm glad to notice that you are g punctually now."
"Yes, sir. I've bought a parrot."
A parrot? What on earth for? I told you get an alarm clock."
Yes; I did. But after a day or two I got used to it and it'didn't wake me. So I got a parrot And now when I go to bed I fix the alarm clock and put the parrot cage on top of it. What that bird says when the alarm goes off would wake up King Tut himself!"
Text read from the printed page and cleaned; old type leaves the occasional error.