MacGregor and MacPherson decided {o become teetotallers, but MacGregor thought it would be best if they had one bottle of whisky to put in the cupboard in case of illness.
After three days MacPherson could bear it no longer and said: "MacGregor, ah'm no verre weel,"
"Too late, MacPherson, ah m'sell all day yesterday." was verre sick No Music Allowed A PEW-OPENER was once much enraged by the appearance of a strange old gentleman who, when the sermon was about {o begin, took an ear-trumpet (in two parts) out of his Pocket, and began screwing them together. The pew-opener watched him till the process was nearly completed, and then, going stealthily up the aisle, he whispered: "Ye manna play that here, my man; if ye dae, I'll put ye oot!"
Text read from the printed page and cleaned; old type leaves the occasional error.