probably.
eaten it, but it described by a diferent mane' on the mend.
Laughter.)
is an interesting fact that when catfish was first put on the market, the public did not, like if because gf its mame, bat now it is called "rock-cod" the fish-and-chips shops a roaring trade in it, The Old Story Way is dog's nose cold?—asks reader of the "Sunday Express" who then supples his own answer.
Noah's Ark' sprang 'a leak, and Noah' stuffed a dog's nose in the hole; that is why dogs' noses are grew larger. Noah put his wife's elbow in the gap? that is Why" women's elbows are. cold.
The hole grew even greater, and Noah put his back to. ity. that is why men always stand with their Vack toa fire Cutting Comment many casson the only British product" red, in ritish fee cream it The water the cutting comment
it" lopserhends with the fee Cream ational Farmers, alone Association over what next summers ite"cream ahall' be made of.
'The use of 30 mvzh water in the manufacture of ice cream. should certainly not be blamed on the mantacturers so long as there is the milkman. as middleman' between them'and the farmers.
'A Rheumatism Surprise Council "dintloven. that. despite AX inquiry by the London Count popular. belief, sheumatise is jerere" in abnormally wet weather the" siperatare fe ower snd' there tis worse daring dry when From which it seems to be clear that it is the levee amount of sun:
me available during' wet weather Which has. so. palliative an effect upon the pation Honest Fellow:
Pouick Coxstanie Haves, of Reading, Herks, summoned himself at the Toeat his But surely the little ident goes to prove that honesty not always the best poliey—not four ings, it isn't The authorities fre wondering what to do next.
This Yeminds us of the sory of the condemned man who, when. was told by the prison authorities that they were empowered to grant ji any reasonable request of his befor execution, stated that he would ike to learn Chinese before he Oomigosh Tue porter met a motorist at the pearly gates, and opened the gates wide enough to permit a glance [down the main street of Heaven.
Motorist_What wonderful highways you have now where are all the cars?
The porter:—We have-none hem—they are all in H Motorist—It tha the case, Til feo down below.
Soon he faced Satan, and wax delighted at the many new models high-priced ears parked just Mototist—Show me which ear is ice of any He srily picked out the finest tone and then asked. "Which is the best road to take?"
Satan—That's the Hell of i'- there isn't any. that the cradle of one of the biggest civilisations of the world twas unable to produce a like international figure? Tt seemed 'a. great pity: more, it heralded the collapse of the British Empire. But fortunately ghe omens are not so bad as they at first appeared. England has failed bring forth a Linebarger, but ithe Empire has not. Away down in Australia the place of wide Jopen spaces, a country in which men are men; and all that sort of, thing, there lives a Mr. John H.C. Sleeman, publicity man for the "Long Government of New South Wales, which landed that state in a sorry sort of financial mess, before an outraged clectorate threw it out of office "on its our." Mr. Sleeman is writing book on Mr. John TT. Long, but what is more important is'that he has already written one on this country entitled "White China, An Austral-Aston Sensation."' He is charging seven shillings and sixpence for his book, and the money is worth it.
Mr, Sleeman's literary style is unique, his ignorance of Chinese matters is highly authoritative, his adherence to the truth is completely unstuck and political insight—well, if what has written is typical of the thought which animated the government of Mr, John T. Long, fail the misfortunes which have befallen New South Wales are now perfectly comprehensible. Before the reader has gone more than fifteen pages into this monumental compilation of unadulterated rubbish it is possible to obtain a good idea of the author's style and historical knowledge "Great Britain, Nankin fought to make China a drag addict." Tt isn't a pretty story, but I'm not, now dealing with pretty stories," Pam facing: history in' all its stark realism, in all its naked horror, and I stand ashamed."
So do we~ashamed that we fare so amused with the absurdity lof the statement that we cannot rouse sufficient anger to call Mr. Seeman by the short, forceful epithet the above passage would Justify. Emperor Yung Cheng have been sadly misinform. ed with regard to opium and the prevalence of its use in his territory when he, issued an edict forbidding opium smoking in 1729, But Mr. Sleeman rises to greater heights. He finds that he Boxer Rebellion should be classed among the greatest patriotic impulses: of history." and we, not being gifted with ithe literary grace of the author [would like to remark "Not arf We have to endorse the statement above quoted because a little later, the author, writing of his desire to help his readers China and Japan. Let us. hope that the dice will Fun true.
Knowing little about polities, but something of craps to which Mi Sleeman appears to be referring, it is humbly suggested that the best thing to do, to see that the /game is not crooked; would be to sk the United States to sit in.
But we are dallying with the subject; we are failing to give the writer a full meed of praise for the ineffable quality of his literary: style:—The "Historians Chinese him. (Em Nero Chinese Nero, debaucheries and defilements, was most ably assisted by Mo Hsi, slave, who became his consort.
A unique and original depravity of this criminal ruler was the making of a lake of wine into which 3,000 Chinese' were compelled to leap to their death at the beat of a drum The people called on Cheng Pang. They nominated him 9 their hero. In the vernacular of that and generation, they said: "Hey, Tang, we've full of the neck of this dissolute, debind.
ced ruler of ours and his xtrunpet of a mistress, the job is yours, Gee to it"
Well, to cut a long story short, T'ang got to it—er, not arf!
Dealing with T'a Chi, the corrupt mistress of Chow Hsin, Ale. Sleeman embroiders his story with a little incident from Sydney.
'The Chinese, however, were tired of the monster and hig gress, 86 nee mare inthe: grim hoot" 9 ced, nebo! lender took the tre and the royal scoundrel, suicide His wite, known in. history. the Chinese Cire, was sentenced to" death, but so' great was. her beauty, that no executioner could found to decapitate the thing beauty "x0" Satanic that Enpire's wadi were as lisle repeating ty FE el ty "Hatory fas " curious way 0
bears age, that a Sitiney_ huge man sutlded rather than stretch aixonan's ad though i hat fea alone, that "aroused (06 ce rote not brent beauty feitioner to execute Mind is a satisfying thought that the great harbour bridge and the above litre. incident combined have put Sydney historically on the mup for fi, time.
But to return to Mr, Sleeman's graphic _style:—"However, the Mongols were but as a boil on the neck bf the Chinese..." Tt ig to be doubted whether the point could be more effectively made than in the direct Language of which Mr. Sleoman is so delight-tula master. Then of Tau Hsi he es "Then there were others who write of her as detractors (Continued on page 397.)
Text read from the printed page and cleaned; old type leaves the occasional error.