Our friend Magruder is selling automatic scales, little ones and big ones, Not so long ago he was demonstrating one of them to an up-state farmer.
"Nothing doing" said the: farmer, "I don't need your new-fangled inventions, I can weigh my pigs without em. I simply take a board and place it over a fence. Then, on one end of the board I put a large stone and on the other end I put the pig. Then I move the stone back and forth until they balance. After that I only have to guess the approximate weight of the stone and I know exactly how much the pig weighs."
Postal Hint One evening I, writes a correspondent, was waiting for a trolley bus at Golders Green. Standing near me was a newsvendor.
Towards us, his gait very unsteady, came one who was obviously "three sheets in the wind" He was making his way as best he could to a pillar-box close to where we were standing. Eventually his objective was reached and then, to our amusement, he circled round and round the pillar-box several times in a vain endeavour to find the aperture.
After watching this performance for a few moments, the newsvendor, grinning, called out: "Take the Yuddy lid off, guv'nor!"
Text read from the printed page and cleaned; old type leaves the occasional error.