Law to Friend: What was it made you choose that applicant for position of gardener?" "I looked at the patches on their "And what the decisive factor?"
"I ignored }the one who had the patch on his seat and*took the one who had the patch on his knees."
Only Fair My batman, writes an officer, a sterling little Yorkshire man, came home cne night very much "under the weather."
Next morning, when he brought in my tea, I sat up in bed, and with as much dignity as I could muster in the circumstances, said: "Do you realize you had a lot to drink last night?"
In broad Yorkshire he replied, "Yes, sir—it was my turn."
Kicked by Mule "Sambo," said the employer to his negro servant, "you are an hour late this morning."
"Yes, sah, I know it, sah. I was kicked by a mule on my way, sah," replied Sambo.
"Well, that ought not to have detained you a much as an hour, you know."
"Well, you see, boss, it wouldn't have if he'd kicked me in this direction, but he kicked me de other way."
Softly 5 Tue cashier of a small cinema pushed out a ticket io the customer. The ticket cost one-and-sixpence; the customer put down a two-Shilling piece and went off without the change.
"Does that often happen?" asked a man standing nearby.
"Quite often," said the cashier.
"What do you do?"
"I always rap on the window with a sponge."
Text read from the printed page and cleaned; old type leaves the occasional error.