A DESPERATE-LOOKING map entered 'a railway carriage where a lady and her, small daughter were already seated. Feeling very alarmed, the Tady tried to get him to leave the carriage by, sayi think it is only fair to tell you, fis, that my lite gin has scarlet that's all right, madam," replied the man, with a ter lance, "I'm committing, suicide at the first tunnel anyway.
The Locomotive is a Lady W. S. Scanpoto, road foreman of locomotives for the Central Ver~ mont Railway, believes he has solved the reason why locomotives are referred to as "she.
"here are many reasons," says they wear Jackets with yokes, pins, shields and stays. They have aprons and laps, too, Not only do they have shoes but they sport pumps and even hose while they drag trains behind them.
whey also attract attention with pufts-and muffers and sometimes they foam and refuse to work, At such times they need to be switched. They need guiding and they require man to feed them. They all smoke, hat most characteristic of all is that they are much steadier when they fare hooked up." clusive, the year was not from 'a little medallion of Her Majesty in the heading, it must have been when Victoria wes young, He did himself well, liked veal chops, cigars and sherry, yet the bill, with waiter (2s) chambermaid (2s) and rots (1s) mooded, was only $2.0.
17th century pasquinade flus. trates the philosophic humour those days, It was called "A Ternary of Paradoxes Magnetic Care of Wounds, Nativity of Tartar in Wine, Image of God in Man." Except as a curiosity we should find it dull now. Another 17th century book (1681) shows that the teetotallers are always with us. deals with "The odious and beastly Sin of Drunkenness, described and showing the fearful] ye befallen notorid. judgments being illustrated with terrifying woodcuts. Yet in the same case is an apostrophe of 1708 to "Wine A Poem" and a little further
of the Grape or Wine, preferable to on nother volume, entitled, "Jace Water." Certainly, ' water alone would never have inspired the old craftsmen to the many beautiful Jdrinking yersels which the Vintners have got together, Marry the girl, Andy, You can always hock the wireless set then, if you run short of money.
Dinirny Dox.
Dear Dirithy Dos
young Indy, an nate been impression that. she was very. much
Entertainment, imagine "my conster-ache "te me On eae. $2, a onan seeing er there with friend of mine! Later she tried. Aell' me that it was only because she had been persuaded by' her parents that the went with. him. "Plense tell what T should My boy, as long ax she loves you, don't try to separate her from her friends." Tt only make her mad, beside which a friend or two like that does take some of the strain loft the pocket nowaday'
Dinitny Dox.
Dear Misg, Dox company with youn jady" of 2 Tan an have been, keeping for about' 13 _montha. Having had Bad lock I have been. prevented from moving anything. The. indy" knows Ais at wont ttc no fr a answer saying, we could get, married on my "dont marry, her soon ure 1 wil lose her for ever.
have her" more. then angiliing the world T can't do that." She thinks if'she waits any longer it" would' be waiting in val swim alongside and get My boy, you might Just an wel you've been properly hooked, and though you might try and behave Tike a game fish, it's easier in the fend to give up at once.
Diniray Dox. each one of which is folly One "bar, incidentally,"
tothe laun-of the Star Jem, the longest, bar fand its. popularity" will soon "place iten a fevel with the Trocadero' Long' Bar, ant other famous West End endeavour, The longest bar is still in Shang hai, We know because we were told yesterday that it took one habitue three hours-to walk its full length the other evening, The Last Hope A contractor borrowed a small and badly worn car from a friend for an emergency trip, The owner apologised for the machine's condlion.
yh, that's alright," said the Jeontractor, "I can" drive anything hat ae four hee andy alin {oan employee to accompany' him, was off "A'Tittle way down the road the contractor noticed the absence of fey. to the ignition switch, 'Later, he' discovered. that. the emergency: brake did not work. After another mile of so he found himself rolling own'a smooth, level road towards bridge, and a'second glance showed a rear gap between the bride find the bank, Vietously he dammed fu the foot-brake, only to find that would not work. Fifty yards from the bridge he stepped hard on the reverie, but the pedal "was stuck znd would not budge.
Turning te. his, companion, grunted: "Wel, lo's hope the petrol gives. on $48 per Case:
Why pay high prices for Proprietary when you can obtain equal quality at $48 per case?
This low quotation is only possible because our Whisky is imported in cask and bottled locally.
Samples of this Whisky have been sent to our suppliers Glasgow, who furnish us with the following:
"The samples of "N.B.R." Whisky have just come to hand and we can out several tests.
We may tell you that we are agreeably surprised at the excellent quality of the Whisky and we congratulate you on the splen you have carried out the blending.
We Showed samples to the greatest, expert in Scotch Whisky who gave it as his opinion that this blend is equal to the best Proprietary Whiskies shipped from Scotland. 'A more complimentary statement you could not get."
Special attention given to orders from To arrive at CLF. price approx., $4 per cate should be added,
Text read from the printed page and cleaned; old type leaves the occasional error.