A Scotsman was stripping the wallpaper from the walls^of his house when a friend, called to see him.
"Weel, Donald," said the latter, "are ye gain' to have a new paper?"
"Na, na," replied Donald, "Ah'm moving'."
Reasonable Visrrors You don't mean to tell me that you have lived in this out-of-the-way place for more than 30 years?
Inhabitant: I have.
Visitor: But, really, I can't see what you find to keep you busy.
Inhabitant: Neither can I—that's why I like s. Wa A Missed Meal Two men from neighbouring farms telling each other their troubles. One complaining about not getting enough to "Only this morning," he said, "the cook says to me, 'Do you know how many pancakes you've ate already this morning? I told her I didn't have occasion to count em. 'Well,' says she, the last one was the 26th. And it made me so wild I got up from the table and went to work without my breakfast."
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Smack from the Windward A Bnmirrm bluejacket walking down one of New York's busy thoroughfares was stopped by some very youthful American naval cadets. They gathered round him with the remark: "Are you a British bluejacket?"
"Yes, I am," said Jack.
"Well, said one of the American sailors, "we could capture your great fleet and have it in New York harbour in 24 hours.'
"That may be so," replied Jack, "but it would take a smarter man than Columbus to discover America the next da; Too Modest Par was trudging along the road, carrying a large sack of potatoes on his back, when he was overtaken by a man driving a horse and cart.
The diver offered Pat a lift, which he gladly accepted. But he sat there, still with the sack on his back, "Put them down in the cart," suggested the driver.
"Shure," Pat replied, "I'm thankful for the lift ye give me, but I don't want ye to be burdened with the taters as well,"
Text read from the printed page and cleaned; old type leaves the occasional error.