A MERCHISTON man w conundrum put to him by hi caught out by this little daughter:
Dadd y." said the child, "can you tell me hat walks on eight legs and sings?"
m atriad I cannot," confessed the fond father.
A quartette," replied the happy youngster. Repartee mE A JUDGE, after calling at the office of a brillilawyer nond, left a law-book on the lawyer's desk, quite unintentionally, The lawyer ordered his clerk to take the volume back to the judge,
bringing him," he said jocularly, "what he meant Ask hin rided the judge, "how he knew it was a law-book!"
"Tinder"
A priest went to a barber's saloon run by one of his Irish parishioners. He noticed that the barber seemed to have been celebrating, but decided to take a chance.
There, Mike, you have cut me," declared the priest after a time.
"Yis, y'r riv'rance," answered the barber.
That just she on," went on the priest in reproving tones, "what the use of strong drink will do."
"Yis, y'r riv'rance," replied the barber humbly, t makes the skin tinder."
Too Small Tue dinner rushed over to the manager. "I've been robbed he screamed. "Somebody has stolen my hat!
"What kind of a hat was it?" asked the manager.
diner.
Was a light brown soft hat," explained" the "H'm," mused the manager, "now that you mention it, I just saw a man walk out with that The Rates Increase very hat The customer looked hastily toward the doors. Municipal ci night of its intention to r ER quick!" he demanded; "what did he look like?" sday ask the ratep ent to the increase ers to con: The man r shook hi head. the municipal rate from 16 to 18 per cent. and "Terrible," he replied, The hat was much too the land tax pro rata will come as no surprise small for him!" to those who have been watching municipal ith any degree of interest. The he o Salad Days There increase in expenditure: anticipated for 193 "Girls attending Nonsuch Park Council naunting to some $5,700,000 is stated to b School, near Sutton, show a reluctance to eat almost entirely attributable to the fall in vegetables." value of the dollar That anticipated increase Mary liked her little lamb has to some extent been offset b; increased And ate it up With shouts revenue, from industrial revent Sie simply didn't care a blow royalties to t d from th For cabbages and sprouts. companies, y $3,000,000 still rema It followed her to school one day was believed that of this Inside a butcher's cart $1,250,000 would be provided by the morea or which x er And all through lessons Mary yearned To tick it next her heart e it been decided to postpone th ication of the new rates from July 1 unt: October 1, it is clear that this expectation will not be realized. There will then remain a sum of approximately $2,000,000 to be carried ov to 1940 er otherwise disposed of. In this con No vegetables, please." she said, Of cating them Im chary "But how 1 like my little lamb "To warm my little Mary."
—By F. G. H. Salesbury in the "Daily Herald." nection satisfactory to note that the Tr surer has reported to the Council the existence of sufficient reserve funds to provide cover for this balance, rendering it unnecessary to resort to borrowing to finance a deficit on the ordinary budget. It is just as well that the suggestion to cover the whole of the deficit out of reserves gained no support. The hat from which so many rabbits have been miraculously produced is not inexhaustible, and should not be too heavily raided at any time, while the grade advancement of the rates rather than a sudd:
of four per cent. is probably bes genees of the moment. that a furth next year, though on gs that hope appears to be a faint o t can be voided it should be, for increase taxation is at all times likely to militar inst that all round improvement which is hoped will s n, once this China Incident has come to an end.
It is indeed regrettable that the question of an increase has to be faced at all but obviously it has to be, and th ratepayers, while they most certainly will not like it, will in all probability accept the bad news with the best grace possible.
Cabinet Jealousy A courte of Cabinet Ministers, who have relied hitherto on their dazzling smiles for glamour, are very jealous of Two Gun Sam Hoar d the joyous publicity which his Wild West tactics hav arned him, writes Showman in the "Daily Herald."
Each has been fobbed off for the time being with the promise that he shall be the first to yet another challenging Americanism.—"Ob, yeah?"—which the Government publicity lacs have just discovered.
The promise, of course, is not worth the cheese it is written on. "Oh, yeah?" is being reserved for the Prime Minister. Any trouble from the jealous couple will be met with a moving appeal for surrender in the cause of yuited loyalty.
Meanwhile, I hear that Two Gun Hoare has already worn two deep furrows in the Table with the rowels of his spurs. Doggone thet ole lizard—he shore air tough!
Text read from the printed page and cleaned; old type leaves the occasional error.