Tur ardent temperance worker bravely followed the burly one into the public-house and watched while he ordered a pint of bitter. Then touching him on the arm, she said:
"Do you think for one moment, my dear man, that that horrible drink is going to quench your thirst?"
The man smiled.
"Wot!" he said. "This ere ope glass? Not blooming' likely!" wee Perseverance Lire Smythe was very shy. At his first dinner party he made frantic efforts to begin a conversation with the woman next to him, but it wasn't until ten minutes had passed that he managed to get out—"Does your brother like cheese?"
She turned with a smile and said—"I haven't a brother."
Dead silence for a while, then—"It—if you had a brother, do you think he'd—he'd like cheese?" see "Togetherments"
Tue tackler and his bride had arrived in the seaside town on their honeymoon. For hours they wandered through the streets looking for lodgings, At last the bridegroom asked a policeman.
"Lodgings?" said the policeman, "Why the place is full of houses with rtments' cards in the windows."
Aye," said the tackler, "but us doesn't want apartments. Us wants togetherments." cee Court Jesters Woman at Highgate: My husband said he realized he had been paying me too much, and he gat a pencil and some paper, saying he would work out some plus and take away.
Solicitor at Wimbledon: You have told the court that you are too poor to be legally represented? Defendant: Yes.
But you arrived here by car?—Yes. But have you seen the car?
Text read from the printed page and cleaned; old type leaves the occasional error.