Ir is Mr, Churchill, of course, wearing false wings and a propeller, who has bombed defenceless Nazi warships; Mr, Churchill, disguished as a big gun, who blasts the innocent horizon: with breaths from Hell: Mr. Churchill, aping a submarine, with his cigar as a periscope, who defiles the purity of the seas, Missed "Jiggin" Returned Home A young child who had been sent to a place of safety was met by a colleague in a Glasgow street the other day. "Did you not like it in the country" he asked. "Oh, ay." was the reply. "It was rare, We got on the horses and we gath the eggs, and there was a wee calf why did you come back?" "It wisney me. It wis ma mother. She canny dae without the jiggin'."
On the Job Two brothers aged 11 and 13 were given by their hostess a brown paper carrier bag and the purchase money for a couple of articles from a local store, On their return they produced from the bag the things they had been sent for together with other articles to the total value of 3s, 9d., and proudly completed the job by handing over the Purchase money as well!
Long Journey AN old lady decided to make a will, which was duly drawn up and witnessed. Later she sent for the witnesses again, and announced hat her will was not in order, She would need to make a fresh one. asked.
"What's wrong with the last will?" they
""T've just been thinking," she said seriously, "that I've left everything to my relatives and kept nothing to myself."
No Danger One fine Saturday morning my friend, Joel Rosenbaum, was in the synagogue. Suddenly, he regan twisting and fidgeting, the perspiration running down his face. His friend, Beddington, whispered to him:
"What is the matter with you, Joel? Why nu keep sti groaned Joel "I came away and left y in the safe.
"Well what docs that matter?" asked Bedlington. "We are all here,"
Text read from the printed page and cleaned; old type leaves the occasional error.