A REFUGEE applied for a position as domestic servant, "Can you cook?" inquired the lady. "No." "Can you sew?" Again a shake of the head. "Can you do housework?" "No, very sorry."
"Well, what can you do?" With a smile the refugee proudly replied, "I can milk elks."
Heard in Court Woman: I had put my baby to bed, and I opened the window so the child could hear the man next door singing in his garden.
Solicitor: Why did you go into the public-house if you had no money?
Man: I thought there might be someone in there who had.
Solicitor: What gave you the impression your husband was spending his money on football coupons?
Woman: I saw him cleaning his football boots, 4
Senator Soaper Says—On Long Island, a sedan skidded 114 feet on its top with no injury to a lady passenger, proving the safety value of the new piled-up coiffure, The benefactor of mankind who disclosed that cigar ashes are good for a rug is in with another. Leaving the clipped. grass benefits the lawn, At Toronto, a store burglar takes only a ukulele and a pair of rubber boots, in case of a high tide at Waikiki.
Text read from the printed page and cleaned; old type leaves the occasional error.