A Lort Rolls Royce was followed through the congested traffic in New York by an antiquated Ford. The Rolls stopped suddenly and the Ford crashed into it.
A policeman came out and asked the driver of the Ford for his name and address.
"Paddy Murphy" was the reply.
"Begorra, is it now?" said the officer. "Hold on a minute while I give the other lellow a ticket for hackin' into ye."
Revenge HAROLD Reger, who used to appear frequently on "boxing cards here, is hot a man to take'a knock lying down, as exemplified in a barnyard incident at the Reger farm.
Harold went to the barn to milk, As he stepped behind a heifer, the animal landed a vicious kick on his shin. Harold let fire right back at her, kicking with all his might against her bony shanks. Again the heifer whammed Harold's shin.
"And then what did you do?" Reger was asked.
"I moved on to another cow Well, Pil Tell You—I vortex wonder why actors are misjudged so much by people: who don't know em. A rich, middle-west farmer moved out West not long ago with his beautiful daughter. One day, a young folia came to him and asked him for his daughter's hand.
Well, sir, when the father found out that the young folia was an actor, he flew into a rage and says, "Now listen here, you loafer, I suppose you think you can marry my daughter and then Til set you up a home and make you rich?"
The young folia says, "No, sir, you misjüdge me—I'm willing' to take her jest for my room and board!"—By Bob Burns.
Sans Rime Ni Raison Sctmrs and rhymers! Cease this battle, Tréve de ces vers de chien, Worthless doggerel, idle prattle, Tout cela ne rime à tien, If, by some, such verse is treasured, Si l'on vent tenter lo coup Let them have it rhymed and measured, Faut hurler avec les loups, And, if still by poets haunted, Tout de go et sans effroi, Let them relish it unflaunted.
Sans erreur quai que ce soit.
But to "spread" it is ungallant, Mais lo pubber, chest bote, Whilst there is such real talent, Quand il est tant de poetes, Witty, humourous and clever, Nourissons benis des muses, Who can versify forever.
Qui à rimailler s'amusent.
So, accept this in true spi Veuillez faire bon accueil, Though devoid' of any merit, A ces lignes de mon receuil, And forgive mine own illusion, Oubliant ce tour d'espidgle, If this verse is a delusion, Si. jo poche contre les règles.
Text read from the printed page and cleaned; old type leaves the occasional error.